Advice for New Moms: The Real Truth No One will Tell You

It has been a long time since I have posted on my blog but while lying in bed this morning I was inspired. I was thinking back to when I was pregnant with Maya and realized that people do not really tell you the real truth about being a new mom. Many times it is wonderful but other times it can be a crazy mess where you often surprise yourself when you are still functioning. I have decided to post the top ten pieces of advice no one will tell new moms so you will be more prepared then I was.

1. No more going to bed late because you feel like it.

When you had no kids, you could stay up late with your husband or boyfriend and watch a movie just because. Now if you stay up late you will be up in three to five hours. My advice: go to bed when your baby goes to bed.

2. No more sleeping in until 9 AM.

For those of you who are pregnant or are thinking about being pregnant or are not thinking about kids at all and say, "I'm tired", there is a whole other aspect of tiredness when you are a mom. I thought sleeping for five hours meant I was tired before becoming a mom. When you have a baby and that baby is up every half hour and you memorize the lifetime TV schedule just to fill the time while she is eating, that is tired. But do not worry, you get used to sleeping on a different schedule and not needing a lot of sleep. And for those of you who need 8 to 10 hours of sleep: good luck to you.

3. Going to the bathroom by yourself is a privilege.

When I had no kids, I would go to the bathroom and close the door. Now when I need to go to the bathroom I wait until my daughter is out of reach of any pens, pencils, scissors or any other sharp object and keep the door open. I try to remember to close it when I have company.

4. Babies do not sleep through the night at 3 months or even 6 months.

Those new moms who say, "Oh, my baby is sleeping 12 hours and he or she is 3 months" are liars or show offs; they are far from perfect. Babies don't just magically sleep through the night at 3 months. You have to teach them to sleep on their own. Even when they do start sleeping through the night and you are so happy because you have finally gotten 7 hours of consistent sleep; don't worry that will be short lived. They will go through a new developmental milestone or be teething or sick and start waking up all over again.

5. Do not listen to those moms who with a smile on their face say they always find time to clean their house and be with their babies.

Those moms are show offs, perfectionists or liars. It is next to impossible to clean your house from top to bottom with a baby. When a baby is a newborn you should sleep when the baby sleeps so you can be there for your baby. That is the most important thing. When your baby is older, you can try to clean your house with her but that takes so much longer and they may try to color on the walls or do something else and then you have more cleaning to do.

6. You can teach your 1 year old about basic emotions.

When your toddler is having a tantrum you can ask her why and give him or her the emotional words to use to tell you why he or she is having a tantrum. It decreases the length of tantrums.

7. Every Milestone is amazing.

It is especially beautiful to be able to have a conversation with your child. Talk to your child like you talk to anyone without baby talk. They are people too and they like it when you have conversations with them.

8. Do not listen to the time periods for each milestone.

Babies and toddlers will do things at their own time and no matter how much you push them to do something they are going to get it. Your baby will not go to kindergarten with a bottle or a pacifier in his or her mouth. Maya went off the pacifier at 15 months and the bottle at 25 months and she is a completely normal kid.

9. You are the mother of your child and you know your child the best.

Anyone who tells you "don't give your baby this food, don't praise her for doing this...." and the list goes on; do not listen to them. Do what you feel is best for your child.

10. You will love your baby despite all of the hardships that comes along with having a child.